17 April 2009

Panic Attack.

This morning brought about a double panic attack:

OhMyGoshImRacingTOMORROW!!!!!

and then this email from Es:

Subject: Breathe In

Breathe out.


99 days to go!

Thanks for the reminder and subsequent panic attack of OHMYGODIRONMANIS99DAYSAWAY Es.

yep. Full panic mode right now.



I didn't get around to packing last night, so I need to go home and throw everything together for my race this weekend. I HATE packing last minute, but at least I have a full list of everything I need:


Or at least I hope that is everything that I need. Luckily if I'm missing something, someone on the team will have it.


Full report upon my return. Should be an interesting race. I get excited when I see only a few people in my age group, and then I realize they are all Collegiate Tri teams... from what I understand its everyone from VT and a few other colleges that didn't want to pay for National's this weekend. At least I know I'll be last going into it :)

11 April 2009

Some days are just hard.

Its my blog and I can cry if I want to.

I don't know how people who cry about anything are able to continue functioning in life. I'm not one to cry often, but when I do, I feel like it sucks every last drop of energy out of me, and leaves me with a tear-hangover. My eyes are all puffy the next day and I feel like shit. Seriously, I don't know how the criers of the world do it.

It's been a rough day. I wanted to go out running this evening because the weather was PERFECT for running, but I was just mentally exhausted. I did some shopping for my sister's wedding, finding bridesmaids necklaces and such.. and it just really hits hard when I stop and realize that Dad's never going to see any of this.. that he's never going to even meet whoever I end up marrying (if that happens), and it just spirals downward from there. Theres no other words than "it sucks". Oh, and "its not fair".

Hopefully the run later today and tomorrows ride go well. I'm looking forward to them.

07 April 2009

A quick post about my underwear

Now that I have your attention..

I picked up a few pairs of Under Armour "Active Hipsters" when I was in Sports Authority a week or so ago. I needed to pick up some new sports bras since all of mine are too big (yes, this post is full of more information than you probably cared to know), compliments of losing weight while my jaw was wired shut. Under the racks of sports bras was a line of UA underwear. I figured what the heck, and grabbed a few pairs since they were on sale, and you can never have enough underwear.

By far, the most comfortable underwear I've ever tried. I wish they weren't so expensive and came in more colors :) Seriously ladies, try a pair if they happen to have them on sale somewhere. You won't be sorry.

06 April 2009

A Long-Winded Post

Or perhaps a post about wind.

On the schedule for this past weekend was a 63-mile ride Saturday, and a 15-mile run Sunday. The temperatures looked to be great for both days, and I was excited to not have a rainy weekend for the first time in what seems like a while.

And then the wind blew. Relentlessly. I've never thought it was possible to be blown off my bike, but I'm pretty sure it almost happened a few times on Saturday's ride. We started out from Tyler Elementary in Gainesville. The first 10 miles were on Rt 245, into a direct headwind. After drafting off Es for two miles (thanks bud), I figured I was strong enough to push harder. I instantly recognized the savings of being in the aero position - sitting up, I was struggling to stay 10 mph. Dropped down aero, I was averaging about 19-20. And then we turned off 245. My bike and I, attempting to stay together as a solid unit, started to dance with the wind. Between every house and break in landscape came gusts which were so powerful, I thought I was going to lose my bike out from under me. Forget taking a drink from a bottle, I couldn't let go of my handlebars. Aero position was out of the question. A quick stop at a 7-11 around mile 16, which was filled with people from the 40 mile ride (left from a different location 30 minutes following the 63's) caused a long pause in my ride. Hoping to catch Es, I threw on my and went screaming down the road. Dropped into aero, I felt awesome.... rocking out going maintaining between 25-28mph. I went sailing past one of our SAG drivers, and waved as I continued down the road. All of the sudden, my coach comes up with the SAG driver whom I just passed in their car, and yells at me to stop. Thinking I was about to get a lecture about riding in the center of the road (I was avoiding potholes on the side of the desolate roads).. I pulled up to their window. Ed, trying to keep a straight face.. says "look at your reflection".

I put my helmet on backwards. Wow.

I can't even explain the logistics of how that actually worked, and how I didn't NOTICE that my helmet was on backwards... but I digress. I fixed my helmet, laughed, and continued on my way. I picked up speed again, and then hit a major pothole. I maintained control, but it beat me to the core. I listened: No flat tire, no bent rims. Life was good until I reached back to grab my Gatorade out of my rear bottle holder. Gone. I stopped, and I literally broke BOTH bottle cages in the hit (side note: I have the same set up as Ray, who also has only lost a bottle due to failure against a severe pothole. Luckily, I didn't break my seat). Rt 713: 2, Lindsay: 0. Once I got everything together, and laughed a little more about the fact I zoomed past a bunch of people with my helmet on backwards, the rest of the ride was rather uneventful. Since I had lost two water bottles in the pothole fiasco, I was way down on calories for the ride. It started to heat up, which wasn't helping, nor was the wind still gusting at 35 knots. I slowed down, and Gina along with another teammate caught up to me. We tackled Snickersville Turnpike together. I'm not sure on the score of Snickersville vs myself, but it was a close match. There were points I was going 3 mph up the hills, every turn of the cranks burning my quads in a strange enjoyably masochistic way.

And then the breakdown started. Groups of motorcyclists were coming from the opposite direction. I couldn't help but think that my dad (proud owner of a Triumph Bonneville) would have loved to been out riding on a day like today. And then came a flood of emotions I've been repressing. I'm sure my teammates had no idea I was bawling under my sunglasses, attempting to keep the tears from welling into my eyes, because I needed to see the road (not that it was passing by quickly - I was still struggling to maintain 4mph up the hills..) I think if I wouldn't have had some teammates there, I would have gotten off my bike and curled up against a tree for a few hours and thrown a self-pity party. I'm glad they were there. The remainder of the ride was good after that, and I returned a bit quicker than I thought I was going to.

I planned to ride on Sunday again with a teammate, however my ass wasn't going to have it. I switched to tri shorts on the 63 miler, and, although comfortable, they take a bit of getting used to. My ass was not that happy with me Sunday. I decided to forgo the additional biking after cheering on teammates at the Cherry Blossom 10-Miler. Instead, I came home, took a nap, got my 13 miles in (hey, I rode around town for a while.. that should count as 2 miles of running).


I miss sleeping in on the weekends.

02 April 2009

It is April already?

or, "Holy crap my first tri of the season is 17 days away"



...Holy crap my first tri of the season IS only 17 days away. I feel so completely under prepared for it, and I don't know why. I go through these ohmygoshwhythehelldidisignupforplacid panic attacks every single few days. As soon as I do Rumpass, I have 3 weeks to prepare for my first half iron. Then 4 weeks to prepare for my second half iron. And what seems like both a lifetime and a flash before my eyes, 7 weeks until I'm toeing the line at Placid. I watch the countdown clock tick closer and closer... 117 days. The first try of the season marks the 100 day countdown to Ironman. I'm not ready to accept double digits. I should trust the training, but I have a hard time doing so. I always feel like I should be doing more. Somehow, this doesn't feel taxing enough.

In spirit of making my life harder, I just signed up for the Army 10 miler and the Marine Corp Marathon. Deep down I hope that I'll be forced to transfer my bibs in exchange for a little race on the Big Island... but I have my doubts. A teammate of mine also pointed out that Mooseman qualifies for World Long Course Championships, enabling me to skip nationals and go straight to Australia. Added another thing to my list of "what if's"... awesome.

I should have a more coherient post, but work and workouts are killing me this week. So, this is all you get.