11 April 2009

Some days are just hard.

Its my blog and I can cry if I want to.

I don't know how people who cry about anything are able to continue functioning in life. I'm not one to cry often, but when I do, I feel like it sucks every last drop of energy out of me, and leaves me with a tear-hangover. My eyes are all puffy the next day and I feel like shit. Seriously, I don't know how the criers of the world do it.

It's been a rough day. I wanted to go out running this evening because the weather was PERFECT for running, but I was just mentally exhausted. I did some shopping for my sister's wedding, finding bridesmaids necklaces and such.. and it just really hits hard when I stop and realize that Dad's never going to see any of this.. that he's never going to even meet whoever I end up marrying (if that happens), and it just spirals downward from there. Theres no other words than "it sucks". Oh, and "its not fair".

Hopefully the run later today and tomorrows ride go well. I'm looking forward to them.


Kelly said...

You've been through a lot, and I can't even imagine.
I'm sure your Dad would love to see you get married.